E.T. phone Rome?

On this week’s episode of Most Retarded Shit Ever…

Creationist preacher Ken Ham recently had this to say when asked about the possibility of the existence of intelligent life on other planets: “The Bible, in sharp contrast to the secular worldview, teaches that earth was specially created, that it is unique and the focus of God’s attention. Life did not evolve but was specially created by God, as Genesis clearly teaches. Christians certainly shouldn’t expect alien life to be cropping up across the universe.”

That statement is clearly retarded on many levels but what makes this the most retarded shit ever is when he goes on to say that all aliens, if they did exist, would go to hell. But don’t take my word for it. Here is his quote: “You see, the Bible makes it clear that Adam’s sin affected the whole universe. This means that any aliens would also be affected by Adam’s sin, but because they are not Adam’s descendants, they can’t have salvation. One day, the whole universe will be judged by fire, and there will be a new heavens and earth. An understanding of the gospel makes it clear that salvation through Christ is only for the Adamic race—human beings who are all descendants of Adam.”

THAT is the most retarded shit ever! What a presumptuous asshole! what a myopic bigoted shitbag! he has damned all intelligent life in the universe to an eternity in hell because of a book that he read.

However there is good news…The Vatican has recently approved the baptizing of Martians. I’m not kidding. If martians are ever stupid enough to show their little green faces on this spiritually backwards planet they will be thrilled to find out that Jesus died for their sins too.


July 29th, 2014|Liberate your SOUL|0 Comments

Yet another orgy of violence

As I write this the news is filled with the horrors of the war in Gaza, but the commercials in between the news segments are for The Expendables 3. Hollywood’s latest and greatest shoot ’em up starring everybody under the sun who has ever pretended to fire a gun.

What a disgrace. War is something to be ashamed of. It is something to be avoided at all costs, but in America we glorify it, and it is movies like these that desensitize minds to the actual atrocities that are happening in the real world every day.

Do you think Im being too sensitive? Well how about this ad campaign for the expendables 3 which actually shows these ‘soldiers’ doing a little light-hearted modeling before they get all murdery.


No big deal. Just a bunch of actors pretending to be soldiers smiling about how fun it is to go into battle and kill or be killed. They sure make war look fun and sexy.

Hey, I finally figured out what Hollywood wants us to do about gun violence… JERK OFF TO IT!

July 28th, 2014|Clarify your MIND|0 Comments

It just don’t make no sense

The other day a thought occurred to me as I was pondering the concept of a hell where evil doers are punished by the Devil, and that thought was this:

WHY WOULD THE DEVIL PUNISH EVIL DOERS?! Why (in the hell) would the King of Sin punish sinners? You’d think he would be rewarding sinners and evil doers. You’d think that it would be the people who kind of sinned a little but didn’t really put their heart into it that would get punished by Satan. (but then again, if you actually thought twice about “hell” you would hopefully realize it was all bullshit in the first place.)

Judeo-christian theology is loaded with this kind of ridiculous contradiction, and honestly this one comes as no real shock. The main surprise was that it had never occurred to me before.



July 17th, 2014|Liberate your SOUL|0 Comments

No irony

Bill Hicks once said when talking about pro-lifers killing abortion doctors, “…that’s what fundamentalism breeds… no irony”

This week the news is all about a bunch of Americans keeping people from crossing the boarder from Mexico. A bunch of white (former European) people are telling a bunch of Latinos that they aren’t allowed in San Diego, or San Clemente, or la Jolla or Los Angeles or Santa Monica or Camarillo or Santa Barbara or San Luis Obispo or Santa Cruz or San Jose or San Francisco and so on. And that’s just California. Let’s not forget that we gotta keep the Mexicans out of New Mexico!

What a joke.

No irony. Kind of like when Christian priests tell their parishioners that they shouldn’t go see all the witch, wizard, and vampire movies that are constantly in theaters. Personally, I wouldn’t bother wasting my time watching those movies, but I’m not gonna be told to avoid magical vampire movies by a guy who performs a rite over some bread and wine in order to magically turn it into flesh and blood that he and his followers then ritually eat and drink.

Don’t even get me started on all the hardcore Israeli rabbis that are shouting about how the Palestinians are less than people and they need to find a way to get rid of them. Its almost as if they would like some sort of ‘final solution’ to the Palestinian problem.

No irony. Sad but true.


July 8th, 2014|Liberate your SOUL|1 Comment

I call bullshit on this

OK. we all know gun violence has gone on the rise and everybody is freaking out. Especially the hypocrite shitbags in Hollywood. They are always crying about how we have to do something about gun violence but then they slap billboards like this all over town


This shameful thing shows Joe America shooting a bunch of people with his extremely large machine-gun. PURGE! ANARCHY! KILL!KILL!KILL! Gee I wonder why we have so many mass murders in this country. I just cant figure it out.

Perhaps some broke, angry, poorly educated schmuck with a head full of video games and a belly full of GMO corn syrup and prescription pills drives by that billboard every day and those words are embedded in his subconscious. KILL! PURGE! He thinks to himself, “That looks fun. I wish I had the balls to do that, to PURGE!” and he takes one step closer to a spree killing. (Spree killings of course being America’s number one export nowadays.)

And while I’m on the subject of how the citizens of this country are being bombarded by horrid and violent images, check this shit out…

The Strain series launch billboard

That’s just fucked up! Period. Not only do I not want to have to look at that awful picture, there are little kids in cars or on buses on their way to school that are forced to have that image embedded into their subconscious minds every day. That is just wrong and I call BULLSHIT on that.

July 2nd, 2014|Clarify your MIND|0 Comments


You might have noticed that the billboards for this years two biggest summer blockbusters are basically the same… however there are some very subtle differences.

You see, on one billboard there is a super intelligent ape waving a machine-gun while riding a horse, and on the other billboard there is an alien robot that turns into a truck that is waving a sword while riding a robotic dinosaur (which also probably turns into a truck).

Clearly the boys on Madison avenue aren’t even bothering to try to pretend to care to be original any more. But what can you expect when they are advertising a rehash of a movie from the 70’s, and a rehash of a cartoon from the 80’s.

America, and sadly indeed the modern world seems to have the mental maturity of an 11 year old boy.

dawn planet apes movie billboard transformers 4 age of extinction billboard

July 2nd, 2014|Clarify your MIND|0 Comments